View Full Version : Nicknames
SirSaltyHelmet
18-12-2005, 22:13
What great nicknames have you heard?
Must be some belters out there
At Shawbury we had one instructor nicknamed "Level One" coincidentaly the same time as the NVQs were introduced
Definition of Level One NVQ
"Performs basic tasks, requires constant supervision"
sausage2
18-12-2005, 23:20
We had a new bloke turn up once, and most jobs he was asked to do he would attempt but ultimately fail.. He came into the office and said in a northern drawl " I can't do it"
After that he was chistened Orvile, and I'm pleased to say that dispite 2 postings and a fitters course, he is still know as that 6 years on.
rest have risen above me
19-12-2005, 00:43
Drill bit...... Another boring tool:rolleyes:
Had a senior called Kerr at one time. All the lads started caling him "Oxford". He took this to be 'cos he was the font of all knowledge. Turned out Oxford United was sponsoed by Wang computers!
(Take you time Opz and Shoutingwind................................ Yep, you got it!)
FLUF... I've known a couple of bods called this, they think it's cute until they find out that it stands for Fat Little Ugly Fu**er.:D
Bushy Mills
19-12-2005, 11:25
Nosmo which confused me until I realised the guy's surname was King and a girl (who is probably still in), that had the nickname Tess, which made no sense to me until I was told her maiden name had been Tickle.
beerengineer
19-12-2005, 11:26
Knew a bloke once, aquired the nickname DC (standing for Dumb C**t) during training. Met him a few years later, he was still usint the same name, apparently when he arrived at his first posting he was asked "what's your name mate?" to whitch he replied...."They call me DC, it's short for Dumb C***!"
Hmmmmm nothing like prooving a point i suppose.....
Retard Retard
19-12-2005, 13:41
'Thrombo' was my favourite for dull students - a slow moving clot.:D
TheHogwartsBEngO
19-12-2005, 14:36
A senior member of Eng Wing at a base in East Anglia a couple of years ago was known, amongst Junior Officers, as 'Exocet'. You could see him coming, knew he would cause devastation, but you could do b*gger all about it.:eek:
I once had a boss we called Goebbels because...
Hitler, he only had one ball,
Goering, he had two but very small,
Himmler had something simmler,
But poor old Goebbels had no balls at all
I didn't really but It's a good one for the future.
Twonston Pickle
19-12-2005, 19:07
'Thrush' - Irritating Cnut.
I used to work with a K9 intercourse specialist called Paxo. Why? 'cos he stuffed big birds.
Gimlet - A small boring tool.......
oldhamboy1967
19-12-2005, 23:35
Gimlet - A small boring tool.......
You weren't overseas with me were you? We had a Gimlet!
Had a Thrush in the Falklands who was aka POD - Prince of Darkness.
When I was an LAC one of the Cpls christened me Thrombosis - A Slow Moving Clot... :mad:
shoutingwind
20-12-2005, 01:44
Had a senior called Kerr at one time. All the lads started caling him "Oxford". He took this to be 'cos he was the font of all knowledge. Turned out Oxford United was sponsoed by Wang computers!
(Take you time Opz and Shoutingwind................................ Yep, you got it!)
umm shoutingwind as in me? coz i'm not getting it, are you taking about Daddy Kerr who married Big Dave on 99?:confused:
Billy Whizz
20-12-2005, 09:09
umm shoutingwind as in me? coz i'm not getting it:confused:
Sorry to hear you're not getting it but then you are in the desert! I'm sure you'll get it when you get back - if Stax has his way!:D
Sorry to hear you're not getting it but then you are in the desert! I'm sure you'll get it when you get back - if Stax has his way!:D
Oh Yes! She will be mine.
Shoutie sweetheart, put the name "Wang" in front of the Guys surname, done that? OK now say it out loud, oops everyones looking at you now!
Have a good christmas and keep your head down.
Norman the Storeman
20-12-2005, 14:25
My fave, that I still use today, was learn't from Stax many moons ago.
Only works with blokes who's name is Stuart/Stewart.
Pid
An oldie but goodie & surprisingly still quite effective today. I've got one on the go here at my unit now, bless him. He still aint clicked. :D
The Controller
20-12-2005, 17:58
An old(ish) SNCO at LATCC (Mil) some time ago was always called ROLF.....(Right Obnoxious Little Fu*ker)....don't think he ever cottoned-on though!:p
PS. This was NOT the suave, sophisticated ex-D&D Controller from yesteryear!:rolleyes:
SirSaltyHelmet
20-12-2005, 18:44
"PS. This was NOT the suave, sophisticated ex-D&D Controller from yesteryear!"
Thought he was called GOF :D :D
Captain Pugwash
20-12-2005, 19:08
Had a "challenging" dog f*cker student who was nicknamed earth by all the instructors and there have been many zulus on the secret wiltshire airbase and probably elsewhere too.
Had to work with a bloke who said his nickname was 'The Fonz', said everyone called him that. Met one of his minions and asked if they did indeed call him 'The Fonz'. All I got back was, " nah it's Elvis". Unfortunately for me, brain was not engaged and I blurt out, " ahhh! I see, found on toilet with a burger in his hands was he then?". I got thumped.
You know who you are.
sausage2
20-12-2005, 20:01
Had to work with a bloke who said his nickname was 'The Fonz', said everyone called him that. Met one of his minions and asked if they did indeed call him 'The Fonz'. All I got back was, " nah it's Elvis". Unfortunately for me, brain was not engaged and I blurt out, " ahhh! I see, found on toilet with a burger in his hands was he then?". I got thumped.
You know who you are.
Tell you what budgie, this fonz bloke sounds cool as fu*k. I bet you lot all thought he was the business. I would love to work for someone as amazing as him.
Knew a rigger liney called driftwood as he just went from place to place doing nothing.
Met more than my share of FRISPs too!:D
Oooh! oooh! ooh! There was FLUMP too very popular he was:rolleyes:
Tell you what budgie, this fonz bloke sounds cool as fu*k. I bet you lot all thought he was the business. I would love to work for someone as amazing as him.
Well he was certainly something as fu*k! I do belive he also got confused with a high profile, balding, middle aged action movie actor. I couldn't see it myself.
sausage2
20-12-2005, 21:11
What a guy i bet he looks like Bruce Willis. Her words not his.
Go on admit it, you loved working for him.
.
Her words yes, she was Inteliigence too!
Well he weren't no Martin.:(
SirPeterHardingsLovechild
23-12-2005, 18:23
Kelvin - for an absolute zero
sausage2
23-12-2005, 19:41
Well he weren't no Martin.:(
Very Cheap, you had to bring him into it didn't you.
All I can respond with is the Pokey faced horror!!!!
shoutingwind
23-12-2005, 20:36
ohh- silly me. thats what you get for being blonde i guess :D
girlies alway tend to get the same nicknames- doris, bird, oi you, bint or blondie....
SirPeterHardingsLovechild
23-12-2005, 21:21
UJ (Urinal Jerkoff) had plenty of time to reflect on being caught misbehaving in the toilets at Halton.
North Sea Tiger
23-12-2005, 21:26
Worked with a lad on the rigs we called Opium .. 'cos he was a slow acting dope.
Nicknamed one waaf supplier at ISK a few years back .. Frijj .. after the milshake drink whose ad tagline was .. "How can something so tasty be so thick"
Knew another waaf nicknamed DCM .. After Davy Crockets Musket .. as in "she has been cocked more often than .."
Ah! WAAF nicknames
Kit Kat, Fit four fingers in it!
Bowling ball, Two fingers and a thumb!
Oh Dear, not nice really!
JOSH IDAHO
Just One SHag I Did A wHore Once.
Cyclops...because they only have one 'I'
You see it's spelt Iain in Scotland.
...It loses a lot when you have to explain it :o
Happy New Year for tonite y'all
HilstonPols
20-01-2006, 12:37
Cub Useless *******
that little title was given at Cranwell to a young JO, stuck with him through various tours. I particularly liked it when he arrived at LATCC(mil) and his trigraph was CUB. Had him jumping around like a 2 year old on smarties and had the rest of us laughing our heads off for weeks.:PDT_Xtremez_30:
mightyhunter
20-01-2006, 14:11
Knew a rigger who's nickname was 8 Gauge. I was young at the time, so it took me a wee while to work it out........ very thick and difficult to work with!!!
SirSaltyHelmet
20-01-2006, 14:13
Anyone remember an ATC FLt Lt nicknamed "Manuel"?
mightyhunter
20-01-2006, 14:15
also, this young leckie was over the moon when he found out that he had the nickname 'earth'. didn't have the heart to tell him that it meant he had zero potential!!!
insideinfoman
20-01-2006, 14:32
Knew a guy called PITFA, in fact a few people called that thinking about it!!!
I thought it was because he had bad acne and his face looked like a pizza!!!!!
Almost called him it to his face till I was told what it stood for :PDT_Xtremez_17:
SirSaltyHelmet
20-01-2006, 14:43
Knew a guy called PITFA, in fact a few people called that thinking about it!!!
I thought it was because he had bad acne and his face looked like a pizza!!!!!
Almost called him it to his face till I was told what it stood for :PDT_Xtremez_17:
Okay, I gave it a few mins
I racked my brains
looked through all the posts
phoned a friend.......
I give up
Are you a really bad alternative comedian or did you deliberately leave out the meaning of PITFA, go insidedude, let us in on the joke!!!
Go on, go on, go on....
If you dont tell us YCCMA will start W@nking in your chip pan!!!
insideinfoman
20-01-2006, 15:30
Sorry SSH
Pain In The Fecking Ar$e!!
:PDT_Xtremez_30:
Standards
20-01-2006, 15:45
Fluffy Two Strokes....... He wore nice fluffy slippers in Dharan and in the Bahrain T-Shirt shop it only took two strokes to persuade him to buy a T-Shirt from one of the lady boys! 9 Sqn has never been the same again!
Standards!
Best two I've heard of are:
CRATE = C-nut Right At The End (cos he was one, and his office was 'right at the end' of the corridor)
SOCRATES = Son Of CRATEs (cos he took over from CRATE)
The Ballerina
31-01-2006, 22:06
Firstly could i just congratulate sausage 2 on the Orvil nickname. I actually know the said indivual and have played some part in ensuring that the name stuck with. I have also met a version of Earth but my two faves are
1st - SOG - Son Of Glover which was an uncanney resemblence of one Gormless lancky Lecky to another.
2nd - Odd kid which just speaks for its self
A rigger in Germany was called SCUD.
Always getting shot down.
TheHogwartsBEngO
01-02-2006, 09:48
This may have been posted before, but I have heard of "Man Z"
During Gulf War-1 - the Chinook Groundcrew had three SNCO’s referred to as:
Jack – as in “Jack –b’stard”
MAC – Man’s A Cnut
JCB – Job Creating B’stard.
As they were all on one shift they were commonly referred to as “Jack, Mac and the JCB” – almost poetic!
78 Sqn (FI) had “Boggy” - who used to introduce himself as "Boggy - because I'm always in the Sh!t."
I also knew:
“Thudnut” - named after stripping a one-inch diameter Banjo-Bolt by turning it the wrong way!
“Notso” normally for someone named “Smart”.
“Huan” ---------“----------“------------------- “King”
“Sarsons” named after another particularly bitter substance.
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