metimmee
04-12-2006, 21:49
I've been trying to find free live Ashes video streaming. I never managed to find the streaming but found this on an LFC fan forum; made me chuckle...
Here are some of the best sledging momments from the past.
1 Mark Waugh to Jimmy Ormond on his Test debut, 2001: “Mate, what are you doing out here? There's no way you're good enough to play for England.”
Ormond: “Maybe not, but at least I'm the best player in my own family.”
2 Merv Hughes to Graeme Hick et al: “Mate, if you just turn the bat over you'll find the instructions on the other side.”
3 Hughes again: “Does your husband play cricket as well?”
4 Mike Atherton, on Merv Hughes: “I couldn't work out what he was saying, except that every sledge ended with ‘arsewipe’.”
5 Dennis Lillee to Mike Gatting, 1994: “Hell, Gatt, move out of the way. I can't see the stumps.”
6 Derek Randall to Lillee, after taking a glancing blow to the head: “No good hitting me there, mate, nothing to damage.”
7 Ian Healy, placing a fielder yards away at cover when Nasser Hussain was batting: “Let's have you right under Nasser's nose.”
8 Tony Greig, England’s South African-born captain, to the young David Hookes, 1977: “When are your balls going to drop, Sonny?”
Hookes: “I don't know, but at least I'm playing cricket for my own country.” Hookes hit Greig for five consecutive fours.
9 Rod Marsh, late Seventies: “How's your wife and my kids?”
Ian Botham: “The wife's fine – the kids are retarded.”
10 Bill Woodfull, Australia’s captain in the Bodyline series of 1932-33, responding to Douglas Jardine's complaint that a slip fielder had sworn at him: “All right, which one of you b@stards called this b@stard a b@stard?”
11 Merv Hughes bowling to Viv Richards, Richards plays and misses at a couple of balls, Hughes quips "hey Viv I'll give you a clue, it's round and red". Next ball Viv promptly hits the ball for a six out of the ground, turns to Merv and says "you know what it looks like, go fcuking find it!".
12 Aussie Glenn McGrath bowling to portly Zimbabwean chicken farmer Eddo Brandes, "Eddo why are you so fcuking fat?" Brandes retorted with "because every time I fcuk your mother, she throws me a biscuit"
13 England batsman Robin Smith played and missed a ball from Aussie bowler Merv Hughes, Hughes told Smith "you can't fcuking bat", Smith promptly hit the next ball to the boundary, turned to Hughes and said "hey Merv we make a fine pair, I can't fcuking bat and you can't fcuking bowl".
14 Merv again. In a test in the West Indies Hughes was bowling to Viv Richards and stared at him after each ball without saying a word. Viv told him "this is my island, my culture, don't you be staring at me, in my culture we just bowl". Merv dismissed him soon after and announced to Viv "in my culture we just say fcuk off".
15 In a match between Australia and Sri Lanka Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner. Aussie wicketkeeper Ian Healy chirped up with this gem which was broadcast live on TV "you don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat cnut".
16 Glenn McGrath to Ramnaresh Sarwan "so what does Brian Lara's dick taste like?" Sarwans reply? "I don't know ask your wife".
17 Aussie Mark Waugh to New Zealander Adam Parore. "I remember you from a couple of years ago, you were sh!t then your fcuking useless now". Parore responded with "Yeah that's me, I remember you were going out with that old, ugly slut and now I hear you've married her you dumb cnut".
18 David Boon came out to bat in an Ashes test in which there had been a fair amount of sledging from both sets of players. As Boon is preparing to face his first delivery the english wicketkeeper says to boon "Hey Boonie, you look like you have got even fatter" to which Boon replies "It coz every time I shag your missus she gives me a biscuit". Now how true that is i don't know but its pretty funny anyway.
Here are some of the best sledging momments from the past.
1 Mark Waugh to Jimmy Ormond on his Test debut, 2001: “Mate, what are you doing out here? There's no way you're good enough to play for England.”
Ormond: “Maybe not, but at least I'm the best player in my own family.”
2 Merv Hughes to Graeme Hick et al: “Mate, if you just turn the bat over you'll find the instructions on the other side.”
3 Hughes again: “Does your husband play cricket as well?”
4 Mike Atherton, on Merv Hughes: “I couldn't work out what he was saying, except that every sledge ended with ‘arsewipe’.”
5 Dennis Lillee to Mike Gatting, 1994: “Hell, Gatt, move out of the way. I can't see the stumps.”
6 Derek Randall to Lillee, after taking a glancing blow to the head: “No good hitting me there, mate, nothing to damage.”
7 Ian Healy, placing a fielder yards away at cover when Nasser Hussain was batting: “Let's have you right under Nasser's nose.”
8 Tony Greig, England’s South African-born captain, to the young David Hookes, 1977: “When are your balls going to drop, Sonny?”
Hookes: “I don't know, but at least I'm playing cricket for my own country.” Hookes hit Greig for five consecutive fours.
9 Rod Marsh, late Seventies: “How's your wife and my kids?”
Ian Botham: “The wife's fine – the kids are retarded.”
10 Bill Woodfull, Australia’s captain in the Bodyline series of 1932-33, responding to Douglas Jardine's complaint that a slip fielder had sworn at him: “All right, which one of you b@stards called this b@stard a b@stard?”
11 Merv Hughes bowling to Viv Richards, Richards plays and misses at a couple of balls, Hughes quips "hey Viv I'll give you a clue, it's round and red". Next ball Viv promptly hits the ball for a six out of the ground, turns to Merv and says "you know what it looks like, go fcuking find it!".
12 Aussie Glenn McGrath bowling to portly Zimbabwean chicken farmer Eddo Brandes, "Eddo why are you so fcuking fat?" Brandes retorted with "because every time I fcuk your mother, she throws me a biscuit"
13 England batsman Robin Smith played and missed a ball from Aussie bowler Merv Hughes, Hughes told Smith "you can't fcuking bat", Smith promptly hit the next ball to the boundary, turned to Hughes and said "hey Merv we make a fine pair, I can't fcuking bat and you can't fcuking bowl".
14 Merv again. In a test in the West Indies Hughes was bowling to Viv Richards and stared at him after each ball without saying a word. Viv told him "this is my island, my culture, don't you be staring at me, in my culture we just bowl". Merv dismissed him soon after and announced to Viv "in my culture we just say fcuk off".
15 In a match between Australia and Sri Lanka Arjuna Ranatunga called for a runner. Aussie wicketkeeper Ian Healy chirped up with this gem which was broadcast live on TV "you don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat cnut".
16 Glenn McGrath to Ramnaresh Sarwan "so what does Brian Lara's dick taste like?" Sarwans reply? "I don't know ask your wife".
17 Aussie Mark Waugh to New Zealander Adam Parore. "I remember you from a couple of years ago, you were sh!t then your fcuking useless now". Parore responded with "Yeah that's me, I remember you were going out with that old, ugly slut and now I hear you've married her you dumb cnut".
18 David Boon came out to bat in an Ashes test in which there had been a fair amount of sledging from both sets of players. As Boon is preparing to face his first delivery the english wicketkeeper says to boon "Hey Boonie, you look like you have got even fatter" to which Boon replies "It coz every time I shag your missus she gives me a biscuit". Now how true that is i don't know but its pretty funny anyway.